Originally Seen - February 12, 2007

This is what I feel best about, the legend continues right? Well, first off, I'm not going to censor myself, I'm backing my Huffy bike up and ready to jump over that shark. Because this is a straight up rant, I'm straight up marking out against one man and one man only.

So let's give this some background before you understand why I'm so pissed off and ranting. I own Sirius radio, who doesn't right? Well, today, as of yeah, like today, while listening to the Howard Stern Show, they first touched on this and then it followed a bit more harsh on his baby cakes, his little protege, the man who'll fill his water cup ala Bubba The Love Sponge Clem. Or Todd as I'm jonesing about.

"This ain't K-5'd"

Now first off, for the fifth time or something crazy like that, this piece of walking and talking trash in which I do respect. I have the utter most respect for this piece of tailcoat riding piece of well, piece. We have a lot of things in common, his name's Bubba, mine's Hach. He has a radio show, I wake up some days. A lot of things in common, right? But let's get this down right here, let's cut through the blubber of it all, I'm straight shootin' right now.

Last night with this stupid little award show, they call it the Grammy's. It's been going on for a few years, we'll say oh, 42 more years than Hachland. So what gets me about this show is a lot of things, in which I may or may not touch on big time. Like the Dixie Chicks. What the fuck is that bullshit!? Who the hell has listened to one of their songs? I haven't since September 10th, 2001. And that's not because I'm a republican or anything, but their songs about flowers and daises have sex with cows didn't handle shit anymore. So why the fuck did they get all these awards? It's simple. Because they spoke out about the war years ago and everyone is sorry for them. So let me tell you why all these Hollywood award shows are all about...

MAKING UP FOR THEIR STUPID MISTAKES!
EVEN IF IT'S NOT EVEN EARNED!!!

But let's fall back to the topic at hand, the heat of mine falls down upon a little discussion about the whole Grammy Awards. In which Bubba the Love Junk and crew brought up who won the Rock Album of the year. Now granted for some fucked up reason the whole Dixie Chicks won album of the year, in which I think is fucked up because according to me they suck.

Although my pissed off rant bukkake style shooting straight into your sister's eye and getting a bounce back into your mom's. So they brought up who won the Rock Album of the year and according to them the winner had no backing. Well, first off before I get back off into this pissed off crapola let's go over the other possible winners as they call it the nominees the John Mayer Trio, Tom Petty, The Raconteurs, Neil Young and of course the winners Red Hot Chili Peppers. Well, three great veterans, a newbie and whoever the hack the Racons-er-conteurs are. Who are they?

Now skipping the facts of the facts, the Red Hot Chili Peppers won. Congratulations. Yet, this is what gets me pissed off. So this little tiny radio show in Tampa Bay, that's in Florida, and it's host and some of it's co-harts go on and bring up how Buckcherry should have won this award. But think about it, really think about it. Have you thought of it long enough? Good. Because let me ask you the same thing you've been asking...

WHO THE FU*K IS BUCKCHERRY!?

They went on to talk about how Buckcherry is more rock than Peppers. They also went on to compare Buckcherry to AC/DC. Now granted Buckcherry is a little more or less in that hard rock unlike Peppers. So I suppose Buckcherry is more hard, but how in the fucking hell can you go off by saying Buckcherry is like AC/DC? And what the fuck!? They're better than the Peppers? Yeah, if you think Hulk Hogan is the greatest wrestler of all-time. Oh, sorry, you do.

But seriously, saying that Buckcherry lives more like a rock band than the Peppers is like saying Schindler's List is more of a comedy than Happy Gilmore. And we all know how funny Schindler's List is. It's comedy a million times, I had to rewind the thing a million times because I laughed so much.

Now obviously I'm joking about laughing at the Schindler's List, but I'm not joking that Buckcherry sucks. A fucking one hit wonder who came back from the ashes of nothing to putting out another CD. That to my best recollection is the worst CD I've never listened to that I've mentioned in this article. I really think talent is one thing and the pieces of shit known as Buckcherry suck. I mean come on, let's go to the book do your own evidence. I've heard garage bands filled with retards all jacked up on down syndrome sounding twenty times better than these white trash pieces of trash.

I mean even Slash hates the lead singer of this band, Josh Todd, he kicked him out of the project which resulted in the forming of Velvet Revolver. And then there's like two pending lawsuits at least with this piece of shit. One involving with a 16 year old being forced topless. Now that's not rock and roll. That's pedophile shit right there.

"By The Way, Who's Buckcherry?"

But yeah, they were nominated for best hard rock performance with their song "Crazy Bitch" although I think I've heard that like three years ago if not ten. But then again, that's a complete rip off of my favorite band, S.M.H. who's hit single "Dumb Bitch" hit the number one singles tops for like ever over at HML. So who sucks now!? Oh, yeah, Buckcherry does, because they lost that to Wolfmother. Yeah, a wolf that turns into a mother. Now that's one crazy bitch right there.

What's real rock and roll? A heroin addiction is. Grammy Award winners. Billboard Award winners. A deceased member of the original band. Sold over 60 million records worldwide, and also hold the record for most number one singles on the Billboard Modern Rock Chart with 11 with a total of 80 weeks at number one. Having a band member known exclusively as Flea. A crap load of music video, movie, TV shows and other crap appearances. It's crazy!

They're rock and roll. Plain and simple. And if these complete rejects think they can compare rock and roll then bring it on. But rock and roll all has to do with one thing. And drug use is a huge impact to it. So if your friend ever goes to you and says Buckcherry is more rock and roll than Red Hot Chili Peppers. Then do me one thing and that's by saying this, and I quote, "HEROIN ADDICTION!"

Oh, by the way, Dixie Chicks suck more than Buckcherry and that my friends is saying something!