Movie Review - Once Upon A Time In Mexico

Anyway, the following will be a review of Once Upon A Time In Mexico. Before I get started (as always), let's give a brief recap of how I grade the reviews here at Hachland. Here's my areas of focus:

     Plot: Kinda self explanatory. If you want to know the plot, it'll be in this heading with a rating.
     Characters: Also self explanatory, like all these categories are.
     Effects: Did the movie look good?
     Kills: Special section for horror movies only.
     Setting: Kinda lame here, but the setting of the movie and all can make a big difference.
     Overall: Was this worth seeing? Should you see it twice? This will be done on a special rating scale.
         "It Stinks And I Don't Like It"= Don't see this shit.
         "I've Had Better"= Not bad, but not worth seeing twice.
         "Time Of My Life"= See this movie, and see it a couple times!

Great recap, sweet piece of work Matt, good job. Once Upon A Time In Mexico:

PLOT: Once Upon A Time In Mexico is a continuation of the storyline started in El Mariachi (1992) and Desperado (1995). Antonio Banderas is "El Mariachi," a Mexican hitman/gunslinger/guitar player/lover. In "Once Upon A Time," Antonio's character is located by goons headed by Cucuy (Danny Trejo playing a different character), hired by corrupt/psychotic CIA Operative Jeffrey Sands (Johnny Depp) to track down and kill General Marquez, a corrupt Mexican General El Mariachi already has revenge issues with. Also in the fray is Mexico's Barillo Cartel, an organization that has paid off General Marquez to overthrow the President and Coup D'Etat the government and take over the post. El Mariachi's task: Find two others to enter the job with him and kill Marquez after his overthrow of the government, immediately turning over the government to something more favorable to Sands. Sands plays all angles though, recruiting retired FBI Agent Jorge Ramirez (Rubén Blades) to track down and kill Barillo (Willem DaFoe) and his private Doctor Guevera, who are responsible for the torture and murder of Ramirez' partner years before. Ramirez turns around and pays off Barillo's right hand man Billy Chambers (Mickey Rourke) who makes sure that everything will run smoothly and he will have information he needs. Furthermore, Sands plots to steal everything from everybody by recruiting a Mexican Enforcment Agent (Eva Mendes) to help him getaway with all the money scot free. The only problem: El Mariachi and his dedication to his country and it's people. Great plot that could only have been come up with by Quentin Tarantino or Robert Rodriguez who wrote, directed, edited, shot, and otherwise OWNED this movie.

SCORE: 9/10

CHARACTERS: El Mariachi is a character that most people fell in love with (figuratively) in Desperado. He sings, he dances, he plays guitar, shoots guns, kills Mexicans, and gets hot ass chicks like Carolina (Salma Hayek). How could you not love the guy. In this film though, there is also Sands, who is awesome as the CIA Agent that has other goals in mind, including his self preservation. Cucuy the thug (which Trejo ALWAYS plays perfectly) is awesome, as well as El Mariachi's two fellow Mariachis, Lorenzo (Enrique Inglesias) and Fideo, especially Fideo who is a balls against the wall unafraid drunk that shoots anything on site. Barillo is believable as a Drug Lord/Socialite, and the main "villain," Marquez, is a worthy ally for El Mariachi, albeit brief in his time.

SCORE: 8/10

EFFECTS: As was the case with my other review this evening of Pirates Of The Caribbean, Once Upon A Time In Mexico was not laiden with special effects shots. In fact, I can't think of one CGI type affect used in the movie. However, there was PLENTY of action, including shoot-outs, army violence, and the occasional torture scene that kind of roundly fit things together. Torture is the perfect tool to round together any movie that is just PACKED with action. Gotta love torture kidies. Whereas Pirates was a Disney Film, this was not, and the violence was thrown at you by the tons and is just in your face. Could have been better if it were more like Desperado, but I liked it none the less, which is a good thing.

SCORE: 7/10

KILLS: This is generally a horror movie section only, I have decided that based on the amount of action in the movie, and the number of people who became recently deceased following the end of the film, it is fair enough that I can count it. There was an insane amount of death in this film, including a cameo by Cheech Marin. There was torture, unnecessary surgical mayhem, gun blasts, shots in the head, shots through the heart, knives, tight wire chokeouts, and the removal of a vital part of ones anatomy for a main character. To me, these aren't on the level of horror movie kills, but I'll be damned if there weren't alot of kills/gore & violence. If this were a horror movie and less people died by gunfire, it'd get a 10 out of 10.

SCORE: 7/10

SETTING: Some movies can't pull off a Mexican setting. They'll try and they'll try and they'll try, but they just can't get it. Once Upon A Time In Mexico has it. Seedy bars, sandy backstreets, poverty spilling out, a kid on a bike selling chiclets, vast deserts, and villages out in the middle of absolutely nowhere. That is Mexico. I can't think of an example offhand of a movie that couldn't pull off Mexico, but I know that most of you probably can. The only person that I've seen that can believably pull it off though is Robert Rodriguez. Desperado, From Dusk Til Dawn, and now Once Upon A Time In Mexico. All pulled off, all good movies. He's doing something right, whether you believe it or not.

SCORE: 10/10

OVERALL: Decent movie. I enjoy the Robert Rodriguez/Tarantino scene alot, dating back to From Dusk Til Dawn/Pulp Fiction. Even though Tarantino had nothing to do at all really with this movie, his influence is still scene in the plotlines of Rodriguez' movies, including this one. He had nothing to do with Desperado either really, or El Mariachi, but hey, can't win em' all. Anything directed by those two guys though is almost quality guaranteed, as long as we forget about Rodriguez' foray into "family" work with the Spy Kids Trilogy. Hey, even The Faculty was tight when compared to those movies. Some people like em', some don't. I, personally, don't. Oh well. Anyway, this is decent.

SCORE: "I've Had Better"

A really tight movie that was packed with action and really good action at that. However, one too many times this had to be saved by Depp and the witty writing of Rodriguez, not to mention the biking Chiclet kid, who possibly had some of the best work in the movie without saying a damn word of English. Now that's impressive. See this if you liked Desperado, you like Banderas, or you like Depp. That's a definite. If you like Tarantino or Rodriguez, this is must see. Go for it. If you're just looking for something to see though, go to something else like Pirates.

Have fun, late.

ORIGINALLY SEEN -- OCTOBER 17th, 2003